Babysitting Update

I know I just did a college update but combining them would have been super long so I split it into two different update posts.

So, I mentioned earlier that I had acquired a babysitting job and that really was the only thing keeping me sane. It made me have to get out of bed, eat, shower, etc.

I also mentioned hoe great the kids and family in general was. However, typically when babysitting, the kids should be the most difficult part of the job, not the parents. In my case, however, the parents are killing me. I have been at this job for 6 (?) weeks and I went from babysitter to maid in the blink of an eye.

During my interview, the father told me I would have to make the girls’ bed, do their dishes, and sometimes help with laundry. It’s fine I do all of that at home and I have helped other families similarly. When I first started, the grandparents were in town from India and the grandma was helping a lot: making their bed occasion, cleaning up random items, etc. However, the day the grandparent left, my life became a living hell.

The mom now expected me to vacuum and dust the girls room and the living room, weekly, do all of the girls’ laundry and then iron the girls’ clothes, clean their whole living space, and then some. I am only being paid $13 an hour and when you have to watch the kids, drive the kids to and from places, and be their personal bitch, that isn’t enough nor is there enough time in the 25 hours I am there per week to get everything done.

The parents told me on my first day there that the girls were far too dependent on their parents and past babysitters so I needed to let them do things themselves. Because of this, I did let the girls do things on their own. However, the mom scolded me when I let the girls brush their teeth themselves, pick their own clothes, and choose their own snacks after school. WHAT

To top it off, they got mad at me when I didn’t pick up their daughter on time. Reasonable, right? Wrong, the mother told me  that the bus would arrive at the stop at 1150 (early dismissal) and ended up arriving at the stop at 1130. Not my damn fault. Anyway, the dad got pissed at me for no reason so not only did I have to drive to her school to pick the kid up, but I also managed to get a lecture from the parents.

In the end, I was tired of being asked too much, being scolded when I couldn’t complete all the tasks asked of me, and not being paid nearly enough for these things. Now, I will begin looking for another job. In the meantime you can catch me, doing no harm, but taking no shit as well.

Until next time

Alicia

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Society Told Me

Yesterday was World Mental Health Day. It has exploded on twitter and it makes me smile to know that there are so many people in this world who struggle with the same issues that I do. It also makes me smile knowing that there are so many people speaking out about their illnesses despite society constantly dehumanizing us for having them.

Mental illnesses have always been something I struggled with. Although when I first started struggling I didn’t know they were called mental illnesses and I merely thought I was some emo freak who wanted to die for attention, because that’s what society told me.

I can remember the first time I ever thought about killing myself in seventh grade and how I thought  would never be happy. I remember thinking that I belonged in an insane asylum which is why it showed up in every single one of my seventh grade art projects. I laughed it off but secretly thought I belonged in one, because that’s what society told me. I can remember the first night I self-harmed and how I had to cover my arms and legs and stomach at all costs in fear of someone calling me out for being a freak and ostracizing me, because that’s what society told them to do. I can remember defending one of my friends for cutting and saying she was just like us. Each of them told me I was “as crazy as her” for saying something like that, and they were afraid she would kill herself because of the cutting, because that’s what society told them, that everyone who cuts is emo and will kill themselves.

Here I am, 7 years after I wanted to kill myself for the first time. I still do sometimes but I begin to realize that this feeling will pass and it won’t make anything better. I can remember the last time I ever self-harmed, a little bit over a year ago. I remember how happy I was when I was one-year self-harm free and how much I cried on that day because I never thought I would live to see that day.

Today I want society to piss off. Mental illnesses are normal. 1 in 4 people have them. The stigma behind mental illnesses needs to stop. If I post this anywhere, ever, I guarantee most people will not even believe this is something I struggle from, because unlike what society tells you, people who live with mental illnesses can function in everyday society just like those without.

The last thing anyone wants to hear is that it gets better, but the one thing everyone needs to hear is that you are not alone. I needed to hear that 7 seven years ago, I needed to hear that last night. World Mental Health Day exists for people who suffer from mental illnesses to know they are not alone. We may feel like it so often, but we aren’t. This day also exists so that we can end this stigma that accompanies mental illnesses. This stigma is the reason I waited 5 years to get help, the reason so many other wait that long or don’t get help at all. Society has dehumanized people with mental illnesses and this is our day, to show that we are humans and we are just as capable. Everyone fights their own battles, mine just take place inside of me.

Oops

Hi everyone. Long time, no blog. I think it’s been 18… 19 days? Anyway, it’s a Friday night, I’m snuggled up in bed, listening to/watching “It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia” post gym trip and acai bowl devouring. It’s been a long few weeks here at school. It seems as if I’ve been here for at least 2 months.

I can’t pinpoint exactly why this semester has dragged so much. It might be because I have classes 4 days a week and Thursday is my day off, maybe because I know I am transferring to ASU in the fall (obviously only if I get in) and am just trying to get out of San Diego (not that I hate it here, but this semester is almost insignificant pertaining to whether or not I make anymore friends, join any clubs, apply for any scholarships etc, or maybe just the fact that I have started noticing things in people whom I call my friends that are just god-awful. They probably aren’t that bad I’m just trying to make the move from school to school as minimally painful as possible and by finding things I hate completely, it will do just that (at least I hope it will)

In order to make this post not 100% negative, there have been many things that have happened since coming back to San Diego that I can’t neglect. I have rekindled my love for chemistry. Which is good, considering I want to be a chemical engineer (Chemistry is a little important). I loved Chemistry in high school but I seemed to have removed that class from my memory considering I received a B+ in that class and not an A. Oh sophomore year Alicia, just get ready for history classes. I am already 2 weeks ahead in that class and I actually doing the homework which is strange. It is only Chem 100 and will continue to get exponentially more difficult, but at the moment I am content will Chemistry.

My online class, American Indian Studies, has to be one of the easiest things I have done in my life (the quizzes while slightly more difficult as also online and not that I would work with a friend, 😉 it is possible and very beneficial for the both of us. The class is very chill and requires minimal work and is actually very interesting because we always learn history of American Indians from the white man’s perspective and this class allows us to get a different perspective.

My Spanish class, Spanish 302 has been decent. I love having it 3 times a week for 50 minutes rather than twice a week for an hour and 15 minutes. The last 20-25 minutes of class always dragged on and on and on but the less time a day we have, I don’t keep looking at the clock. ALSO, there many beautiful men in my class who are also sweet and good at Spanish. I have been doing rather decent in the class as well. Our first test is Monday and we were doing a review sheet in class. My profesora was picking kids by last name in the order of question answering. We were at the section of the review sheet where we have to switch sentences in the direct form to the indirect form. My profesora said “Esta pregunta, el fin, es más dificil que los otros… Alicia” which mean that the question I had to answer was the hardest. And guess who got it perfect?! This girl did. Let me give myself a pat on the back. Also, everyone thinks I’m 20 and I’m only 18. So either I look 20, or I seem smart, or both. I’ll take it.

While I did say that joining clubs this semester don’t really matter, I did go to the first SDSU Democrats meeting of the semester with some friends of mine. It was very insightful and nice to know that there are people who are just as (or more if that’s possible) liberal as I am and that they care about the future of not only San Diego, but our Nation as a whole. One of the vice presidents of Planned Parenthood came to speak to us about Planned Parenthood is being affected and how it is under attack due to the conservative criticism and pro-life supporters. She also discussed how we can become active and volunteer to help Planned Parenthood. Honestly, it was so amazing to hear this woman speak and it rally showed me how important this election is for everyone in the country.

There probably have been other aspects of coming back to State that have been great, that I just can’t remember.
Also, sorry I’m so flaky with my posts, I have decided that posting 3-4 times a week is just not really plausible for me. So, since Thursday is my offset, you can expect posts every Sunday and Thursday. This post doesn’t count because I’m implementing it now.

Anyway, Talk to you all soon (tomorrow)
Alicia

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