Renaissance Woman

Hello everyone and happy Thursday to you all. It is currently 12:29 am and I am frivolously typing away on my keyboard, my sleep deprived eyes drooping every few clicks of the keys.

My entire life I have never wanted to do one thing. I have never been that girl who has wanted to be a surgeon or a teacher or an artist since she was 6 years. I wasn’t that girl who applied to two schools because they had the major she wanted and great internship and job opportunities, pertaining to her major, upon graduation.

I was the girl who wanted to be a princess, an artist, an actress, a writer, a  mathematician, an actuary, a business woman, a world traveler, a math teacher, a nutritionist, a marine biologist, an english teacher, and so many more by the time she was 18. I applied to over 15 schools because I couldn’t make up my mind about anything.

I always used to think this was because nothing interested me. I was a depression filled, anxiety ridden teen, who couldn’t be wooed by one thing or another.

It wasn’t that nothing interested me, it’s that everything interests me. There is not one thing I can see myself doing for the rest of my life, not because I want to do nothing, but because I want to do everything. I want to star in a hollywood production, see the aurora borealis, do someone’s taxes, invent something, learn about animals, and help a struggling teenager get into college.

There isn’t one job that fits me. I am a puzzle piece that fits into every puzzle while simultaneously doesn’t fit into any.

I think I keep thinking about this because I don’t want to transfer again. I need to pick Ohio or DePaul and I need to pick one soon. My grandfather keeps pressuring me to visit DePaul, call DePaul, look at DePaul’s website and so on, and it is making me want to rip my hair out.

What happens if I pick DePaul and then want to do something else with my life that DePaul doesn’t offer? Or if the same thing happens at Ohio.

As I lay in my blanket burrito, and as my anxious thoughts completely take over me, I wonder… why does no one else have this problem? Why did every single person I know apply to 5 or less colleges and then just pick one? No one transfered, no one waited until April 30th to make an admission decision, no one is laying in their bed, two years later trying to find a new school so they don’t make the same mistakes they had made two years prior.

The only sounds I hear are of a dog snoring next to me in bed (we are only watching her for a week… unfortunately) but inside my head is like a Final Four March Madness game.

Everyone keeps telling me that it doesn’t matter where you go to school, but let’s be honest… it does. I have to like it, it has to be affordable, and they have to have a major(s) that I like and want to pursue.

I like both schools and  once I get financial aid we will talk about affordability. However, the latter, the majors are what I’m coping with. The difference in majors along with my inability to make a commitment and stand by it are the reasons I am still up at 12:48am with a loud and messy head.

I keep weighing the pros and cons. Both schools have pros. Both have cons. Both pros outweigh the cons and there isn’t one that stands out to me. I think I need to just go to DePaul one day and then see if I can get back to Ohio for a few days to really see if I can picture myself on either campus.

Sorry for all the rambling but writing is my way of thinking.

On the bright side, just about 2 weeks till Peru. I have begun packing, and am talking to a girl about going to Machu Picchu over Easter. Half of my life is stressing about college and the other half is pure joy about going to Peru and volunteering. I guess that’s compromise for you…


Day at DePaul

Hi everyone, yesterday I had the opportunity to visit DePaul University (the second of my two college options). I live super close so I have been on/ around campus a few times (the vegan cupcake place I mentioned in a post last summer is less than a block from campus) but yesterday I went on an official tour (specifically crafted for transfer students… not sure how much it differs from the freshmen tour but it’s what I was told) of the campus. The weather in Chicago has been absolutely wonderful and completely out of character for February. It has been in the mid to upper 60s and low 70s for the past week (but no… global warming doesn’t exist) but of course yesterday was 40s and raining. Is that a sign from the God I don’t believe in? Kidding, but overall I enjoyed my visit to campus and am even more conflicted on my final college choice.

DePaul’s campus is pretty small (however there are two different campuses; one in Lincoln Park, which we visited yesterday, and one in the Loop) and everything is within a two block radius, unless I have to have classes at the Loop campus, which I will. Students are all given a ventra ticket with unlimited rides for this reason, so there is no cost for getting from class to class which is super nice for school days and also nice for going places on weekends.

For it being such a small campus, there are a plethora of places to go for relaxing, studying, eating, etc. I’ve been to campus a time or two before yesterday so I knew what the library looked like, where the union was, etc.but it was nice to be able to see all of the students in their natural habitats (I have only been on campus when school was not in session) and to be able to learn about buildings I never saw or the significance behind some of the statues on campus.

The tour was very personal and quaint. There were about 6 families and 4 groups of guides so my dad and I had our tour guide all to ourselves. Not that I had any questions, because I’ve done all my research online and I know how a meal plan works, but had I had any questions it would have been so easy to ask any type of question. It was thorough and very informational but also to the point and didn’t drag anything out too long.

All in all, I am now even more conflicted about my decision about college and will continue to make lists about both schools and when I receive my financial aid packages, I might get a better sense of where I want to be.

I can truly see myself at either school, which isn’t what I really wanted to happen. I sort of wanted one to stick out as a front runner but both schools have everything I need and more, and beautiful, and I feel like I fit in at either place.

Well, I’ll be here with my white board and a Venn diagram, ripping my hair out.


A trip to Bobcat nation

Hi everyone, well as I mentioned in a few of my most recent posts, I had a visit at Ohio University on Monday. My dad and I left for Ohio bright and early Sunday morning for the six and a half hour drive to Athens.

Now for those of you who live in the Midwest of the States, you can probably feel my pain on any long drive. There is nothing to look at except for corn, and when it isn’t the season for corn, you see dirt and the occasional small city with a population of 17. So, those six or so hours were agonizingly boring, however, we were able to boost the mood by listening to music and spotting some cows, horses, llamas, and the occasional cool barn. When we were about an hour or so away from Athens we began to see some hills and really cool rock forms on the side of the hill because we were getting closer to the Appalachian mountains. So, the end was at least pretty.

When we arrived in Athens, we checked into our hotel, stretched out for a bit because after driving for 7 hours all you want to do is get out of that damn car, and then left again to check out Athens.

Athens is a weird city. It has that small town feel but since it is also a college town, a ton of people live there. However, there wasn’t a Target so hypothetically if I attend that school, I’m going to have to deal with WalMart and Aldi, which isn’t great, but I’ll live.

I really didn’t feel like walking around, since we were getting a tour the next day, so my dad and I drove around the entire campus and then around Athens. This campus is very car accessible, meaning we could get to almost any point on campus by car (we later learned this is partially due to the 40 residence halls located all across campus), so we did. We drove all over campus and the surrounding area multiple times, checking out the football stadium, convocation center, the rec center, the student union, and a bunch of other buildings I don’t remember.

Although some of the buildings are over 200 years old, they are all in remarkable shape. The campus also has its original cobblestone roads from 200 years ago as well. My dad didn’t like driving on them, but they do add to the beauty and character of the campus.

After we drove around in circles, squares, triangles, ovals, and more, we decided to make our way to a Ruby Tuesday (which had one vegan option other than the salad bar) and then back to the hotel.

Convocation Center Parking lot at sunset.

The next morning was the day of our tour, meeting with an undergraduate advisor, and then another 7 hours drive back home. The tour was super laid back, as was our tour guide because it was a tour of solely transfer students (me and another girl) and our parents. It was nice not to have to be with all of the incoming freshmen because we didn’t have to listen to their questions about shower shoes, and the freshman 15. We were able to see the library, the union, some other class and admin buildings, and then 2 dorms, an older dorm and a newer dorm, however, they were both in impeccable shape, no matter the year they were built.

The walk back to our car. Didn’t get too many photos but the buildings are lovely

After our tour was over, we waited for the admissions advisor, which was sort of pointless. I thought she was going to have some information for me but it was basically just me thinking of random questions that I had already googled or could easily google. Nevertheless, she did give me a few resources to check out as I await for my big envelope in the mail, so it wasn’t terrible.

See you (hopefully) soon Athens 🙂

After that, we got in the car, stopped at a gas station and were homebound. And after countless wrecks, a closed highway, a detour, and a few wrong turns (thank you apple maps) we were home with a big decision to make.

We may have had a 20 mile detour but the sunset was well worth it

College update post Part… no clue

Hi, everyone. Well, with Peru approaching and then summer and then oh yeah, college, I have my decision narrowed down to two schools; Ohio University and Depaul University. I have yet to be admitted into either school because my high school screwed up my transcript requests and I wasted $18 for them to lose my forms so my applications weren’t finished until like a week ago… anyway, I am visiting Ohio on the 13th, and can really visit DePaul whenever since it’s so close.

As far as I know, I would be down with attending either school, and not that this is impacting my decision at all, Ohio is in the top 5 vegan-friendly universities in the country, something I hadn’t found out until I was exploring the campus’ website the other day.

Anyway, they both have a plethora of majors, because I have decided that I can’t choose what I want to do, because I want to do everything. I am a ‘Renaissance Man Woman’ wannabe. However, for when I change my major 85 times I’ll have the ability to because both schools have far more than that.

I’m visiting Ohio on a school day, and I really hope to do the same with DePaul because I feel that this is how you get a feel for the campus. When you can see all of the people you will be attending school with, you can see if you fit well on that campus.

When I visited San Diego State, I fell in love with the campus, from the smooth Spanish curves of the buildings, to the swaying palms, and how the sun cast so gorgeously across the entire campus.

What I didn’t see were the students. I visited the campus over my spring break, which coincidentally was their spring break as well. I didn’t get to gauge the student body and stalking the school’s Instagram’s page doesn’t do the best job.

When I got to State, I realized that I didn’t fit in with the student body, and I may have chosen a different school in the first place had I seen the school as a whole.

Basically, I just need to get accepted into the schools, figure out how much money I get from either school and then pick one (unless there is only one option, but I don’t really think there will be).

So, I’ll talk later about how my Ohio visit was and then my application status of both schools as I hear.

Until then,

I’ll be here, waiting to get out of this stuffy house and back to school before I claw my own eyes out. Whoever told me that once I took a break from school I would never want to go back, must never have taken a break from school themselves.


Quick College Update post

Hi everyone. So, a couple posts ago, I mentioned that I had absolutely zero clue where i wanted to transfer to next fall. Well this is still the case, but I have a little bit more figured out.

For starters, college. I have been looking into schools for about a month, picking ones with a variety of majors, extracurriculars and good financial aid packages. I had written a list of maybe 15 colleges down that had all of these. Upon further investigation, hearing from other students, etc, I have narrowed my list down to 7, and here’s why.

  1. DePaul University- Lincoln Park, Il: DePaul is a great school that is close to almost everything in Chicago. With a wide variety of extracurriculars. Sports, and majors, it’s basically perfect. The only con is that because of the proximity to my house, my parents are urging me to live at home while I attend. I get saving $15000 and potential loans in ideal, but at what cost?
  2. Ohio University- Athens, Ohio: This is newer on the list so I don’t have an insane amount of reasons why it’s there. The school is great, they have everything I need and more, plus  I Wouldn’t have to live at home…
  3. Xavier University- Cincinnati Ohio: Xavier is still high on my list because it was my second option for schooling the first time around. It’s a beautiful quaint campus with an impressive track record on all things academic. My only issue is it doesn’t have a huge variety of majors so if I want to switch (again) I may be out of luck.
  4. The University of Findlay- Findlay, Ohio: These last 4 are on the list because they have everything I need, some even more. I really want to attend one of the top 3, but if somehow that can’t happen, one of these four will be just as great.
  5. Otterbein University- Westerville, Ohio: These last 4 are on the list because they have everything I need, some even more. I really want to attend one of the top 3, but if somehow that can’t happen, one of these four will be just as great.
  6. Winona State University- Winona Minnesota: These last 4 are on the list because they have everything I need, some even more. I really want to attend one of the top 3, but if somehow that can’t happen, one of these four will be just as great.
  7. Clarke University- Dubuque Iowa: These last 4 are on the list because they have everything I need, some even more. I really want to attend one of the top 3, but if somehow that can’t happen, one of these four will be just as great.

I have asked my dad to let me visit Xavier and University of Ohio soon so that I Can gauge if I want/still want to attend either. I have visited DePaul, however I have not taken an official tour. I want to do and get a bit more information to make a truly educated decision.


Giddy but Inconclusive

Alrighty-o fam. Here we are, still giddy and such despite having worked a full shift on my feet today and wanting to pass out.

Now, we have made it this far with my college choice and major decision, here comes the hard part: choosing a school. I can recall quite vividly crying on my couch as I scrolled over every college website I possibly could, without having a major in mind. Never in my life did I think I would have to complete this process all over again unless of course, I would be attending graduate school (besides the point). However, at this point, I have a solid major and minor combo (Spanish major with photojournalism minor)  and need to find a school containing both, being cheap, and probably closer to home. I didn’t really miss home but it’s a request of my family. Also,  my training I have to go to is based out of the midwest so it helps that I’ll be closer. Also, I sort of want a smaller school because I felt like I knew like 2 people at SDSU because of how big it is.

Funny isn’t it, how when choosing my first college I wanted as far from home as I could get, big school, warm weather, and a school with a football team. After me realizing that my parents weren’t just going to sneak up on me any random time, attending one football game, and realizing I hated the big school atmosphere, I want the complete opposite from a school. I’m still on boat with the school being as cheap as possible, but honestly, who isn’t?

We have a variety of schools to choose from, not too large of a variety but enough wiggle room to have a few good schools that I’ll be sure to find at least one I love.

The school choices (so far) are…

  1. Cardinal Stritch University (Wisconsin)
  2. Otterbein University (Ohio)
  3. University of Indianapolis (Indiana)
  4. University of Tennessee-Martin (Tennessee)
  5. Andrews Universty (Michigan)
  6. Murray State University (Kentucky)
  7. Ashland University (Ohio)
  8. Winona State University (Minnesota)
  9. The University of Findlay (Ohio)
  10. Xavier University (Ohio)

I’m sort of partial to Xavier University in Cincinnati because that was actually my top choice behind SDSU but I didn’t choose it because they have no football team, it was small, and religious (I know you don’t have to be of that religion to attend but still, Theology 101… really?!)

So, who knows. Might end up at Xavier, might end up at one of the others I mentioned. Or I may even end up elsewhere.

Update on my current schooling situation. I will not be attending ASU in the fall and will most likely be staying here and working or babysitting and whatnot. However, my aunt is in town from Phoenix and still wants me to live with her. So I might go live with my aunt for the fall semester and work but honestly. who knows? Not me.

I have a lot on my plate for the next few weeks and a lot of tough decisions to make. However, I’m happy (and tired) as can be.




Giddy. I am giddy.

Ever since starting this blog almost 9 months ago, I have blogged about being vegan, college, and every other aspect of my life as I saw fit. I have gone on and on about not knowing what I wanted to do with my life, where I wanted to go to college, and why people do things they hate just to make an extra buck or two.

Since a little while before my birthday (when my neighbor was flabbergasted at my major choice)  I have been having constant mental breakdowns about college because I do not/ never did want to become an engineer and I was pressured into doing so by my family.

Last week at work, one of the ladies in the front office told me a very important piece of information. “I have sat at this desk 40 hours a week for the past 30 years. I hate it. And I can’t stress this enough. Do something you love and for god’s sake don’t get a desk job”

So, after having all of these mental breakdowns, cry sessions with my dog, and my parents trying to wrap their heads around what was going on inside of mine, I am a few steps closer to having a future to be proud of and happy with,

I told my dad that if all else fails I’m going to Spain to teach English to kids, I would finish college at some unbeknownst location, get my visa and move to Spain to start my job search, Yes, it’s a bit more complicated than that but I was brainstorming. Apparently this brainstorming led to my father telling my mother and she,  due to a friend from high school, was able to find the perfect job for me.

Something I have also had a longing to do has been to travel. I also love Spanish and even though I don’t want kids of my own, children love me and through my last 9 years of babysitting I think kids and I get along rather well.

There is a thing called TEFL (Teaching English as a Foreign Language) and my mom’s friend started the International TEFL Academy where you can become certified in teaching English in other countries. She is going to talk with him and find out exactly what I need to major in to be suited for that program so I, like many other lucky individuals, can travel the world and get paid for doing something we love. Ever since that night that we discussed that option, I have been looking at schools across the country with spanish, ESL, and journalism (just because) majors so that I can be on the next step to doing something I love.

It’s only been a few days since this and already a weight has been lifted off my shoulders, I am happier, smiling more, and just overall enjoying life.  At dinner tonight my mom asked if I had taken some energy drink because I literally couldn’t sit still. Was it because of my delicious kombucha and black bean burger? Quite possibly. But, is the more likely option the fact that I am finally going to be doing something that I love and my parents are on board? Absolutely.

Until my next post I will be looking for a university that I can finish up at and prepare me for an amazing chapter of my life that I cannot wait to embark on

Also, I will continue to be giddy, because for the first time in a very long time, things are looking up for me.